Posts Tagged With: wedding

an April wedding

Thing 1 and fiance N are getting married in April!
Not a ‘white dress, let’s have a big party’ wedding. An ‘at the courthouse with only our family’ wedding.

N is in a (well, several) program(s) for veterans. They’re paying to send him back to school (for an IT degree). They also pay him what I guess equates to a “salary” while he’s in school so he doesn’t have to work full time and got to school full time. (I’m not up on all the specifics.)
Anyway.
Fiance N and Thing 1 can receive more benefits if they’re married than if he’s single. So they spent a fairly decent amount of time talking about what they wanted to do and decided they’re going to get married at the courthouse now and they’ll have their wedding and reception on their first or second anniversary.

When Thing 1 called to tell me all this I suspect she was waiting for some “Mommmy backlash”. on the contrary, I think they’re making very smart choices for their future. It makes sense to utilize the benefits to the best of their ability. It makes sense to wait to have a more formal wedding and reception.
I fully support this choice. It took me a long time to be able to say that, because there was a long time that I simply wasn’t “feeling” N for my girl. I had big worries.
But after spending time with them before our wedding and at Christmas time, I got to see how they function as a couple. I got to hear their ideas for their future. I got to hear their dreams of the life they wanted to share.
It wasn’t that I finally got to know him better, but I got to know them better. I think they’re on the same page about what they want. What their hopes and dreams for a life together are.

I still have my concerns about her age. The fact he’s the first person she’s ever had sex with. Their age difference.
But I see past most of that and realize they’re doing what’s best for them right now. And I absolutely support that!

YBW and I are getting on a plane.
Her dad and Thing 2 are driving down.
N’s mom is driving down.
So their family with be with them when they get married.

Even though there’s not white dress (yet), I made sure Thing 1 does have a something new to wear.
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We talked about how it didn’t have to be white if she didn’t want it to be and this is what she chose. It’s so very Thing 1! It’s a gorgeous silver and she’s mad about it.
I’ll be sending a bouquet of purple iris (her all-time favorite flower) for her to carry from this amazing site, The Bouqs Co.. Sundance hooked me up with it (after she had the idea Thing 1 needed flowers) that’s a great Auntie and Godmother right there, ya’ll!

My child, who has never really been at home in her own skin, is finally content.
The Mommy inside me is doing the happiest happy dance!

Categories: love, on being a mom, wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

nine of twelve hundred

I’m finally getting around to sorting through the twelve hundred wedding photos.
What needs to be printed and what sizes.
I’m working to create a book.
I have to say, it’s daunting as hell!

I’ve chosen a few to share here:

I think the series from the train tracks are my favorite.
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Thing 1 made a bouquet of the spikes we found.
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Boy feet.
I love the Chucks! I wish YBW had worn them for the wedding too, but he did change for the reception.
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Here comes the bride. (and her Things)
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Girlie feet!
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Thing 2 comforting her big sister during the Song of Songs. (You can’t see it, but I’m holding her hand.)
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YBW reading his vows.
He borrowed heavily from Joss Whedon but spoke from his “Wash” heart to my “Zoe” heart.
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Wedding bell is ringing.
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Signing my name to make it official for the church.
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love was made for me and you

This is one of my favorite images from our wedding.
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Every single photo taken during the ceremony shows my daughters like this.
Thing 2 holding Thing 1’s hand in both of hers. Thing 1 says it’s because she was crying so much and Thing 2 was comforting her.
That sounds about right.

Here’s another one that pleases me. Our first dance.
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L-O-V-E.

It was the very best day I’ve experienced in many years. The absolute joy in the church that day. The love of our closest friends and family surrounding us.
It was the most fun wedding I’ve ever been to. Not because it was ours, but because it was interactive. The congregants participated in our ceremony. We laughed, we cried.
YBW’s nephew read from Song of Solomon. His oldest friend read from 1 John. Girlie Thing read the Recipe of Love. We made each other cry. My beloved friend and mentor prayed beautifully for us. And that fabulous ‘girl in a collar’ blessed us in the most special way.
In the middle of our beautiful Episcopal ceremony there was a moment for YBW and me to share our own vows. I had practiced so much that I’d committed mine to memory.
When I began to speak, YBW said: You’re not going to read them?
I said: I memorized them.
His eyes got very big and there was laughter in the church.
Thing 2 said: She worked so hard, just let her go!
More laughter.
Mine was a short paragraph about trust and experiencing a different love with him.
YBW borrowed heavily from Joss Whedon and did manage to include “corpsified and gross” much to my joy!

At the reception, our Things made speeches, Thing C and Thing G telling funny and inappropriate YBW stories. Thing C said something about how it’s not YBW and Robynbird anymore, it’s YBW and Robynbird together. (this made more sense in the inflection)
Thing 2 wandered off for a moment but came back to where she started and as hard is her precious little heart is she told us we “made a believer” out of her.
Thing 1 broke my heart talking about happiness and love. She acknowledged how happy YBW helps me be. She expressed her love for him, not simply because of that, but because she loves him.
My precious and darling nephew, Boy Thing spoke of how I wasn’t just his aunt, I was his second mom and he is who he is today because I was in his life. (We cried in each other’s arms for a moment after he finished.)

YBW and I kissed each time the flatware hit the glasses. We laughed as we explained why there was a little black dolly on our wedding cake.
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We danced the night away.
It was the most wonderful day in the history of YBW and Robynbird…so far…

I hadn’t anticipated this post going the way it did when I started. I thought it was going to be about the girls holding hands…turns out I needed to talk about the entire day.
It was a mighty fine shindig.

Categories: love, on being a mom, Uncategorized, wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

dog and pony show

I’ve been known to say: Weddings are nothing more than a dog and pony show. But I’m all about the most perfect ones for my daughters.
Well as it turns out I’m planning one for myself and YBW…
It doesn’t feel like a dog and pony show. Perhaps that’s because we’re going low key. Less than sixty people, just our children as attendants. Teeny church we’ll pack to near full even with so few. Intimate reception space. Good wine, dearest friends and family, s’mores bar…

I’m torn between that feeling of excited anticipation and the desire for it all to just be over.
I feel exhausted and overwhelmed from planning.
I am so joyful that our most beloved people will come together to celebrate with us.

Later this morning, Thing 2 and I will have our final dress fittings, drop off extension cords, the napkins and wine charms and response book to the decorator. I think these are the last errands to run. At least I hope they are. I need to do a quick tidy before Thing 1 and the guys arrive tomorrow. But other than that I want to lie low. Do my best to relax so I can shake the exhaustion and feeling of being overwhelmed.

I went to a meeting about a job yesterday. I was leery of scheduling it for this week, my fear of not having enough time gripped me like a noose. But I took a big breath and went. I’m glad I did, because I believe it was successful and I’ll be getting an offer while I’m honeymooning.
It was weird to do something non-wedding related.
My head was bad yesterday, but I was able to dazzle at the meeting.
Thing 2 and I camped out on the sofa yesterday afternoon when we got home from errands after the interview and watched our favorite Halloween movie, Hocus Pocus.

I’m tired of waiting. I’m ready for Saturday. I couldn’t have said that last week, there was still too much to do. I don’t want to rush this week along, but I’m at that place where I’ve spent so much time working on the wedding that now that I’ve nothing to do I’m almost more anxious.

I have a great deal of head pain which removes sleep from the equation but I’m going to try and go back to bed for a few hours and see if I can start again.

I have planned and planned and coordinated until I can’t anymore but I haven’t really focused on how lovely it will be to stand in front of God and the people I love most and join my life to YBW’s.
Just writing that sentence helped.
The idea of the love of the people in that room to support and bless us brings me great hope. Saying the words I wrote just for him, being prayed over, and sealing it all with a kiss really makes it feel worth the anxiety.

If it is a dog and pony show, well it’s our dog and pony show and that’s all that matters.

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taking a break with street art

We were at the Eastern Market on Capitol Hill yesterday. It was chillier than we expected, but we still had fun wandering and looking and even a teeny bit of shopping.

Thing 2 and I stopped to look at the street art created by local school children.
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This was my favorite. Thing 2 decided she was the smiley face that was a bit out of focus. This amused us both.

We swung by Sona Creamery to pick up their delicious goat cheese but there wasn’t any. The owner told me it would be ready Monday and she’d have it all week. (That’s cool, but I live an hour away and she doesn’t ship.)

We found a house for sale on South Carolina Ave. If there were no kids at home, I would totally pack up and move there. Of course the house was 1.34 million…so yeah…that won’t be happening.

We caught up to the boys and went for an early dinner at Ted’s Bulletin. Pretty delish comfort food with great decor.

Was nice to have a break from wedding wedding wedding…
All the napkins are finished.
The ribbons tied round the wine charms.
The “busy work” complete.
I’m feeling pretty good right about now…and I’m not even waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

problematic napkins

These napkins just might be the death of me!
My sewing machine is not quite right. The bobbin tension is wonky and I can’t get it right. I need to take it and have it looked at.
So I went the fusible tape route. Now, this should have been a simple operation…stick the tape, fold the seam, and iron.
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Should have been.
This fusible tape was created by the devil himself! It won’t stick to the fabric. It won’t peel from the paper. It sticks to itself.
Thing 2 and I were at our wit’s end and I was near foaming at the mouth. Thursday was the day I had the crazy temper fit. It took us all day to make just eight napkins. ALL DAMN DAY!
YBW came home from work asking how he could help and we just growled at him.

I’m so happy I vowed to take a break Friday. I got to visit with one of my former student’s mom, she hung out much longer than expected. There was a part of me that was anxious about not getting anything done, but it was good to stop for a while. YBW came home right as she was leaving and we made a meal plan for the week, Thing 2 has offered to do the cooking so I can do wedding things as needed.
(Thank you, Mousk)
We made a Costo list and a grocery store list and Thing 2 and I set out.

I’m about to go back to the napkins this morning…I see the finished ones and feel happy and hope.
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I got this.

Categories: wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.

I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.

This tiny verse from Song of Solomon makes my heart so happy. A emailed me about the wedding bulletin asking from which version of the Bible I pulled this Old Testament reading because she wasn’t sure about it. My Bible is a New King James version, a gift from my mother.

YBW’s nephew is doing this particular reading. Song of Solomon 2:10-14,16 and 8:6-7. I “cherry picked” what I liked most. (It’s my Bible AND my wedding so I can read what I want to.) As much as I love what’s going on in this bit of scripture, it’s 2:16 that sells it. In my Bible is actually reads: My beloved is mine and I am his. But I like it the other way better.

What’s so wonderful about it is that it isn’t just YBW and me as beloveds. It’s about being beloved of God.
A personal relationship with God is intimate and fulfilling and has so much love.
It makes sense to me that the words of love in Song of Songs use the love between two people as the example from which to learn. That our ideal relationship with God can be likened to and understood as the ideal relationship between two people.

So many people use God as vengeance. Not that there aren’t a bazillion examples to site…but to me, God is love. And if I love God and God loves me then I can use that concept of love to make my love for YBW even more fulfilling.
YBW is my beloved.
Why?
Because I know how to love him and be loved by him.
How?
Because I have faith. Because I trust.
I wouldn’t know how to do that if the love of God wasn’t in me.

I’m extremely private about my relationship with God. I don’t talk about it much. It’s complicated and we’ve had our ups and downs. And for a little while I turned my back on it.
But what I do know is that there is love in me.

Categories: love, wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

museum moonshine

As I mentioned in It’s a date!, A charged us to each plan a date for the other.
Last night was the date YBW planned.
We arrived about half an hour early and decided to wander a bit. I took a few photos (with my phone) outside the Museum of the American Indian while YBW blew up portals on Ingress.
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It was just breezy enough to make the shadows of the corn on the building feel almost Halloween-y!

Our date was an event called “Museum Moonshine, Eclipse in the Garden” at the National Air and Space Museum downtown. Telescopes set up on the garden terrace to better see the supermoon eclipse. Yummies and goodies to taste. Event panels to educate and entertain.
We were totally getting our nerd on!
But I love the moon like crazy, so it was perfect for me. The event was at the air and space museum, therefore it was perfect for YBW.

Food was a little charcuterie bento box from Sona Creamery. Apparently the first creamery to actually make their cheese in DC proper. They had the absolute best goat cheese I’ve ever tasted. (Y’all, I eat a LOT of goat cheese.) It was creamy and buttery with much less of that tang you get with goat cheese. I love that tang, but this was something else entirely. There’s a wine and cheese paring class in October that I’m hoping to take. Just for fun. (And to buy some of that goat cheese.)

Drink offerings came in the form of “Bee Sting Mead” (I seriously checked how they made their mead before I tasted any because I’m allergic to bees and didn’t feel like YBW having to stab me in my thigh because I had a drink.) I was assured it was just a fun name and I would be safe. Charm City Meadworks offered us a mead spiced with a pepper I can’t remember the name of, and a basil lemongrass mead. (YUM!) They’re Baltimore based but they do ship via Schneider’s of Capitol Hill
The mead maker and two Smithsonian Gardens employees gave a talk called “Bee There” about pollinators. They discussed Charm City’s beekeeping to create their mead as well as what the Smithsonian does to make it easier for natural pollinators to visit their gardens.
It was actually quite interesting. We need pollinators, especially bees…even though they could kill me.

A second talk was lead by Jamie Floyd of Ninkasi Brewing Company. Essentially it was about how some of the brewing company’s yeast had been to space and back aboard a model rocket. It was playful and fun with clips of model rocket “bloopers”.
The beer they make from the space traveling yeast is an imperial stout called “Ground Control”.
It was gross…but I don’t like stout.

After the talks, we went out to the garden terrace and watched the eclipse. It had been cloudy and foul since late Friday night but the breeze on Sunday began to clear the clouds away. And we were able to watch as Earth came between the sun and moon!
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We weren’t able to really see any of the umbra because the clouds came back in with a vengeance. So we drove home quietly holding hands.

It was great fun and we didn’t talk about the wedding once.
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Categories: love, wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

something shiny with your name on it

I ordered the wedding favors today.
Wine charms. Little silver discs stamped with each guest’s name.
I ordered them via Etsy from a girl in Kansas called Coco. I’m not sure why I love that so much. But it really tickles me.
I even ordered one for each of the children. Now, the little kids can’t drink wine, but everybody loves something shiny with their name on it. I’d love to see my little D tie his to his bike as a name plate…must remember to suggest that to his dad.

I have all the mad lib responses back except for one of Ben’s frat brothers who apparently lost the invitation, Sundance and her family, and my sister-in-law and her family.
Sundance knows I’m shaking my head at her, but I also know they’ll be there. Sundance has known YBW since they were in elementary school and Girlie Thing is reading at the wedding.
My sister-in-law and her family aren’t going to be able to make it. She and I have already talked about that. I am sad, but I understand. It’s about doing what’s right for your family, and right now them coming here for a weekend in October isn’t going to work. I told her that our love was solid and it was fine if they didn’t come. I do have a bit of sadness, but I understand how hard it is to make everything work for your family.
Thing 2 and Boyfriend D’s responses finally arrived early this week which made me SO happy!

I’ve given the final count to both the caterer and the event coordinator and the three of us will meet at the winery next week to make sure we’re well sorted.

There’s a laundry list of things that still need to be completed.
I’ve got time.
Sort of…next week is October. I better get a move on.

Categories: wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

It’s a date!

At our last pre-wedding meeting, A charged us to go on a date.
YBW and I side-eyed each other.
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Pfft! We know how to go on a date.

Needless to say, she noticed our conceit and challenged us further. Instead of one date, we each had to come up with a date for the other with the strict stipulation that we couldn’t discuss wedding stuff.
One more smug look was a silent “we got this” and we were on our way.

The date I planned took us downtown for a picnic at the National Arboretum and a side trip to Oak Hill Cemetery. I broke the rule straight away in the car. YBW reminded me and I sat on my hands as long as I could stand it. But then I had a stroke of genus! Traveling to the date wasn’t actually being on the date. I immediately amended the rule to include wedding talk in the car but only until we arrived at our destination. (I know it sounds ridiculous, but it’s Robynbird logic…just roll with it.) 
Of course this time of year there isn’t much in bloom at the Arboretum, but that was actually beneficial because it meant less people.
The first thing we did on our date was split up. (I know…) But YBW wanted to see all the bonsai and I wanted to visit the herb garden.
I was fortunate to catch a few things still in bloom while successfully avoiding the bees gleaning the last little bit yummies before there were no more blossoms to be had.
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The light was harsh, but I enjoyed my time behind the lens.
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It may seem odd that the first thing YBW and I did on our date was walk in opposite directions, but neither of us wanted to follow the other around like a puppy so we did what we wanted to do knowing we’d end up in the same place. And as it turned out, just as I was finishing up in the herb garden, the most adorable man walked up and kissed me. Then we walked together up the hill to see the Capital columns.
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Kinda pretty, don’tcha think?

We picnicked on fruit, veggies, potato salad, and cold fried chicken trying to figure out what was actually going on at the Grove of State Trees. We drove all around the arboretum, even out the non-existent road that was the original entrance.
Then it took forty minutes to drive about six miles. As we passed embassies I used the long lens of my camera to read the plaques over the doors and YBW teased that the red light cameras saw and we would be branded spies. I just laughed.
We got to Oak Hill Cemetery just in time to capitalize on the most glorious afternoon light.
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Once again, we split up. Me meandering along looking for good shots on the way to Kay Graham’s gravesite. YBW playing Ingress…turns our cemeteries are ripe with portals for the hacking.
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Allow me to quote Minerva from Midnight in the Garden, “To understand the living, you got to commune with the dead.” I’m a firm believer in this concept.
I love cemeteries. I love everything about them. The gravestones seem so natural in the environment, on the hillsides and under trees. I love the peaceful quiet. There was construction on R Street, and I mean jackhammer construction, but the further I walked into the cemetery the more quiet it became.
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There was one place in the cemetery that wasn’t still. It was quiet, but there was work going on. I can’t believe it took me passing it twice before I realized what I was seeing.
Construction on the mausoleum of Ben Bradlee, one of my most beloved folk heroes! Qu’il repose en paix.
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It’s a bit modern for my taste and for it’s location, but I wasn’t consulted…what are you gonna do?

YBW and I ended our day at a cafe table on the patio of a small restaurant in Old Town sipping cocktails of vodka laced iced tea.
Never once talking about the wedding.
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Categories: love, me, wedding | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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