Author Archives: robynbird

About robynbird

I've been a writer since I could hold a pencil in my hand. I'm learning new and wonderful things about myself through my writing and realized it isn't enough just to write it down, I need to share it. What I have to say may not be Earth shattering, but it is filled with love and I hope it moves those who read it.

a tune for Tuesday vol 178

Love Teddy Swims’ voice.
Love this melody.
Love the lyrics.

Here’s Illenium and Teddy Swims with All That Really Matters.
Give it a spin and let me know what you think.

Please listen responsibly.

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a tune for Tuesday vol 177

I can’t even with this song, y’all!
It brings me such tween and teenage joy!

Check out Fallin’ With Me by the Sruts.
Let me know what you think.

Please listen responsibly.

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a tune for Tuesday vol 176

Y’all! This song is so damn good!
It’s sad and sweet and romantic and poignant. And I find my self hearing something new each time I listen.
Here’s Arctic Monkeys with There’d Better Be a Mirrorball.
Let me know what you think.

Please listen responsibly.

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a tune for Tuesday vol 175

The more I hear this song, the more I enjoy it.
I like the melody, kind of boppy (is that even a way to describe music anymore?), but that’s undermined by the darker lyrics.

Just off the highway
Beyond the part of primrose
They’re there in absentia
It’s a gallant, faint home
No no, you’re not invited
The door is always closed
There’s an ugly inside it
It’s where the pretty kids go
It’s where the pretty kids go

At the end of somewhere
Just beyond the turn
There’s a distant fire
I can smell it burn
See the shadows dancing
In the amber glow
Just outside of nowhere
It’s where the pretty kids go
It’s where the pretty kids go

Bad intentions
Broken by design
No exceptions
We’re just wasting time
If you don’t drink to Kool-Aid
Then you’ll really never know
What poison tastes like
It’s where the pretty kids go
It’s where the pretty kids go
It’s where the pretty kids go

Go
Go, go

Just burned the city
Above that noise
When it’s straight in madness

Clearly I’m on about otherness lately…

Please listen responsibly.

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a tune for Tuesday vol 174

This song was the September feature on Sameer Gadhia’s Point of Origin.
I love it musically.
I encourage you to listen to the lyrics.
The way Brittney Parks explores her otherness through the concept of how she wears her hair speaks to the young girl in me.

Am I good enough, am I good enough?
About time I embrace myself and soul
Time I feed my selfish soul

This is Selfish Soul by Sudan Archives.
Let me know what you think.

Please listen responsibly.

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listen with conviction

I saw this post on Stephen Satterfield‘s instagram. It spoke to me in a way I must have needed that day. I created a screenshot and looked at it every day since.

You can see the pic isn’t all that much to write home about, though I am a fan of sunset photos.
No, what got me was his caption.

If it’s in your head then you gotta let it out. If it’s in your chest then put it in the air. If it’s in your heart then put it in the world. Don’t be scared. Even if you are. Find your center and sit there. God don’t need to pray, just us. Listen with conviction.

I’m still mulling over these words, figuring out how to apply them to the place they piqued inside me.

If it’s in you, get it out into the world. (But also) listen with conviction.
Isn’t that why we write?
Isn’t that why we read?
Isn’t that why we converse?
Isn’t that why we have relationships with family and friends?

Don’t be scared. Even if you are.
We tell Baby K how brave she is when she does something that makes her nervous. She replies that she isn’t/wasn’t brave, she is/was scared. We explain that being brave is doing the thing even though you’re scared.
This feels similar yet different. Yes, be brave and do the things that frighten you, but also don’t be frightened about expressing your truth.
The world will kick your ass and send you running. And that can be frightening, but if you’re sitting firmly in your center, you have nothing to fear.

Did these words find me off center?
Perhaps.
They did remind me to pay attention. To myself. To the world around me.
If we’re planted firmly in our own center can we express ourselves and listen to the world around us without fear?
Perhaps.
What do y’all think?

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searching for grace

One day last week a teacher at school asked me how I knew a particular person. I replied that she’s my aunt. How do you know her?
Her ex husband is besties with my cousin, that aunt’s younger son. And she’s known him since she was a teenager.
The teacher asked quietly if I’d spoken to my aunt or uncle lately.
In all honestly, I hadn’t spoken to them since my dad died in 2014.

(Here’s where a bit of backstory is important…
My dad was adopted when he was five year old.
The family who adopted him also had loads of foster kids.
This aunt is married to one of those foster kids. So even though I’m not blood kin to any of these people, that’s how I was raised. One of the foster kids is my uncle, and his wife my aunt.)

As the teacher and I stood in the hallway at school, she told me that my other cousin and his wife were found in their home, deceased victims of gunshot wounds.

I honestly didn’t know how to feel.

I remember the day he was born.
I was ten.
We were at Grandma’s and my uncle came over to share his joy. His first son had been born early that day. I remember being so excited about a baby cousin! I remember hugging my uncle. I remember joyful tears.

I keep thinking about that baby who became that little boy. Who became that teenager who became that grown man.
How could he be gone?

He’s gone because he found out his wife was seeing another man and he shot her.
Then he shot himself.

I didn’t feel equipped to process this information when I spoke to my uncle. All I could do was tell him I loved him.

I keep coming back to a seeming inability to make sense of it.
I keep thinking I wish my dad was here to talk about it with me.

My heart is hurting.
How much pain exists in one to take a life and then one’s own?
I’m actively working to understand.
I’m expressing love and support to my uncle, aunt and cousin.
I’m not at all judging, I’m simply trying to make sense of it.
I’m searching for grace and hoping my family finds peace in their grief.

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a tune for Tuesday vol 173

Heard this one on the Advanced Placement show and knew straight away I’d be sharing it with y’all.
My love for Vampire Weekend is no secret, so when Ezra provided guest vocals for this Phoenix song, I was all over it.

Check out Tonight by Phoenix featuring Ezra Koenig and let me know what you think!

Please listen responsibly.

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something gorgeously dark and moody

Ever since we moved into this house I wanted to do something dramatic for the main floor powder room. I envisioned something gorgeously dark and moody.
It had a basic builder’s grade mirror and I started looking for a new on not long after we moved in. In my mind I saw a large circle mirror. But the more I looked, the more I wondered…it’s ten foot ceilings in there, what if I used a tall mirror? And found a fun pendant light to reflect off the mirror?
I ran this concept by YBW and he was on board.
I finally found the perfect mirror at Target of all places. (only on line)
Light fixture came from Wayfair. (on sale)

I searched out wallpaper on and off for a year before finally landing on a beautiful Victorian floral. It sat for a bit while we did other things, but Sunday of Labor Day weekend, YBW and I took a few hours to get it up. And no bickering, even though I got ridiculously frustrated and rage quit for about three minutes before going back in and finishing it up.

I’m so pleased with the way it turned out!

As I was standing in there admiring our hard work, YBW said, “Now, do the walls stay white?”
I was just thinking the same thing. We were specific about wanting all white walls so we could bring color in textiles and art and furniture and decor. But as we looked at that gorgeous wallpaper we both wondered if the other walls needed changing.
Stay tuned…
Even over a year later, we’re still making this house our home and I am so here for it!

Categories: around the house | Tags: , , , , , , | 2 Comments

little joys

After the last couple weeks I am unbelievably content to be in my own home to sleep through the night in my own bed, and to get things the way I like them.

Oftentimes it’s the little things that bring the most joy and I’ve found big joy in the littlest things in the last week or so.

a gorgeous Georgia sunset.


unpacking the Autumn bins

Spending a day with Thing 1 and Baby K shopping at Home Goods and Target, and yummy (Baby K requested) lunch of cheeseburgers, milkshakes, and french fries at Five Guys. Thing 1 was thrilled with all the Halloween stuff at Home Goods, and in her own words, “I had no self control.” She sent Husband N a photo of her buggy and he remarked that the retail therapy was good for her.
I found more Autumn things and mused if YBW would be like, WFT? if I brought home more pumpkins. Thing 1 reminded me he was pretty clear about how many Baby Jesuses were too many Baby Jesuses, but had never applied that to pumpkins.
I actually only bought one pumpkin, I did however get new fall napkins and dish towels (which he did have something to say about) but I’m content and I suspect he accepts that.

I realized Sunday morning as I was putting away the new towels it might behoove me to roll them instead of fold them, and sure enough, I can get two and one half rolled towels in the space I got two folded towels.

I will admit to being excited about this…after all, I did say it was the little things.
Of course some of the regular towels are in the laundry, but the Autumnal plaid and mustard yellow towels will only be active September through November, and the Halloween ones only in October so I feel confident about the allotted space.
(especially since as soon as those fall towels get packed up, Christmasy ones will come out)

It’s still hot as balls here, but I’m embracing meteorological fall in every possible way!

I finally hung the lights on the roof terrace. Of course the outdoor extension cord I have isn’t long enough, but a perfect length one was delivered the following day.

Looking forward to using the fire pit as the evenings get cooler. (a gift from all our kids last Christmas)

When I sent that photo of the towel drawer in the group chat with the girls, I wrote: I discovered I can get more towels in the drawer if I roll instead of fold!!! It’s the little things
To which Thing 1 replied: Awesome! I love it
Then I wrote: Thanks! It’s lame but I got excited about it, so thanks for going with me!

I share that sentiment with y’all, it’s a bit lame, but I thank you for going with me.
It really is the little things.
Where are y’all finding joy today?

Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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