Posts Tagged With: silly

silly reindeer

Baby K spent Saturday night with us so her mom and dad could get some last minute holiday stuff done before her other grandmother comes late tomorrow.

Our girl loves herself some snapchat filters.
“Me! Me!”

“Now ‘Boowie’!”

Who wore it better?
I’m going to go ahead and cast my vote for the toddler.

I hope y’all are doing all the fun/goofy/wonderful holiday things that bring you all the joy!

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name that bee

I can’t make this stuff up, y’all.
This is what Thing 1 and I get up to on a summer afternoon.

I sent a message to the girls in our group chat that I passed the third course. (YAY!)
Thing 1 replied with a Wahoo!
Then sent a pic of Baby K with the caption “Baby K says Go Birdie!”

What follows is just us being us…

Thing 1 and Thing C are big Batman fans and this little Batman along with some other Batman things were gifts from Uncle Thing C for Baby K.
I sent the bee because it was so damn cute I couldn’t stand it! It was on her registry and I sent something else randomly and the bee went too. I sent it with a card that said, “Baby K, Bee a good girl! Birdie loves you!”
Thing 1 said she reached out for the bee then gave it kisses. (OMG how cute is that!?!)
Apparently today, she’s kissing Batman.
So, it’s not bee specific, it’s lovey specific..?

Here’s Baby K with the bee.

What do y’all think?
How about some name suggestions for Baby K’s bee?
I promise to give you credit!

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Do you even Bitmoji?

This is my Bitmoji. She looks as much like me as a bunch of pixels possibly can. And y’all, I have to tell you, I love the stuffing out of her!

I enjoy communicating with my Bitmoji. With Nora, mostly via text, and Sundance via text and Snapchat, but especially with Thing 1 and Thing 2. We have a group chat in Snapchat that makes it SUPER easy to use our Bitmojis.

Another thing that’s cool about Bitmoji in Snapchat is that if another Snapchat user has a Bitmoji, they can do things together. But only one at a time, so when it comes to my group chat with the girls, it’s just one of them with me at a time.

Thing 1 sent me a kiss.

Thanks to the Olympics, Thing 2 was able to express her love of figure skating.

I have no idea why Thing 2 and I are behind this tree, but we look shady af.

I sent this one when I expressed my desire to wave a magic wand to alleviate her morning sickness. I love love love her little baby bump!

The girls Bitmojis bring me such joy! They look so like my girls. And seeing them all together makes me all smiley. If our avatars can be in the same place at the same time, it feels more like we’re together even when we’re far apart.

I recently changed my Bitmoji’s hair. I was wearing it curly for so long while trying to grow it out from a pixie cut that was never as cute on me as it was in the photos. Letting my curls do their thing made it simpler to tolerate the growing out process. But now that it’s the way I want it, I’ve been putting forth the effort to wear my hair straight.
Thing 1 quickly expressed that she is not a fan of the new do.
It’s funny, because her straight hair makes her look younger than her curly hair…perhaps as a soon to be grandmother, she ought not look younger?

Anyway, they’re fun and playful and we get great joy from sharing them.
You can check out the updated app that lets you create an avatar here:

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I’m a ray of f**king sunshine

I really like cuss words.
Profanity.
Dirty words.
Offensive language.
Bad words.
Expletives.
Swear words.
Obscenitites
Whatever you call ’em, they make me happy.
I find them excellent descriptive words great for most any situation.

I have been told that my passion for, and abundant use of curse words denotes a lack of intelligence on my part. (You know I’m saying a great big ‘f**k you’ to those folks.) But, According to Richard Stephens at Keele University,

The fact is that the size of your vocabulary of swear words is linked with your overall vocabulary, and swearing is inextricably linked to the experience and expression of feelings and emotions.

Unlike the vast majority of women in the world, (some men too) I am a fan of the “C word”.
I know.
I don’t mind if you judge me. Most folks do when it comes to this particular word.
To me it’s just another bad word. It doesn’t offend me in any way, and in some cases I find it amusing.
So much so that I had a bit of a squee when banter cards ran a half-price sale on their ‘not quite perfect’ hardback notebooks!
I ordered a few. I mean honestly can one ever have enough journals?
And they’re just so me.
(“C word” alert!!)

As happy as I am with each one, and My C**ting Notepad brings me the biggest smirk, I’m going to have to admit that List Whore just might be my favorite.
Like there was any doubt…but y’all! It even has a little heart! I (heart) lists!
Though a reminder to not be a bitch is always helpful, because some times I simply can’t help myself.

Going to contemplate the perfect use for each one…
In the meantime, I got fun stickers for immediate use in my planner.

Organized as f**k.
You know it!

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random “Baby Outbursts”

I’m having random “Baby Outbursts” all over the place.
YBW is beginning to get a kick out of tracking them. Luckily for me he’s super patient, because most of these occur in the least convenient times and place. And they look a bit like I may be having some sort of attack of palsy.

I experienced one yesterday afternoon while engaged in a text conversation with Thing 2!
We can get the bebe a load of Nats gear!

I shared that with Thing 1 in a phone call yesterday. First we oodgey-goodgey(ed), then I expressed my hope that people in Georgia wouldn’t be ‘mean’ to the bebe because he or she is a Nats fan. She laughed and said even Braves fans wouldn’t be ‘mean’ to a bebe…maybe to the parents, but she could handle that. Then we laughed again.
It’s tricky being a Nats fan in Braves territory, but she’s on top of it.
We’re idiots, but we have fun.

Another such outburst took place last night.
We went to dinner with M and J. M and YBW were fraternity brothers, and he and his precious wife are my most favorite of all YBW’s friends.
We four have a monthly date. Last night we were meant to go to this new (to us) amazing burger joint, only when we arrived, it was slam-jammed with folks and no place to sit. So we ended up at a little Mexican restaurant instead. (Even though Mexican is some of my fave food, I spent a great deal of time looking at Melt’s menu online and was more than mildly disappointed we missed out on burgers.)
It ended up OK, we enjoyed our dinner. We enjoyed each other’s company. I oodgey-goodgey(ed) about the bebe. And they joined right in on it!
We finally decided to leave the restaurant and head over to M and J’s house. YBW wanted coffee so we stopped off at the coffee shop before we got in the car. My random “Baby Outburst” happened in the coffee shop while YBW, J, and I waited for our coffees.
I realized if the bebe is a girl, I’ll be able to have things monogrammed for her!
Y’all this brought me much joy! Neither Thing 1 nor Thing 2 give a rat’s ass about their monogram. Now partly this is because they each have a repeating letter which makes a monogram look lopsided, and partly it’s because they went to high school surrounded by ‘basic white girls’ who plastered their monograms on anything that didn’t move.
And my girls are anything but basic.
While I absolutely adore my monogram, I am ‘preppy’ not ‘basic’. Because I actually lived through the 1980s. A point I’ve had to make to my girls more than once.

Anyway…
If the bebe is a girl, she too will have a repeating letter in her monogram. But I do not care. And she won’t care. She’ll be oblivious for the first few years of her life. And while we aren’t about gender norms for this bebe, I will sure as hell make sure she has something(s) with her monogram so she and I can be goofy, girlie, and oodgey-goodgey about it together!
If the bebe is a boy, well…he’ll still have something(s) monogrammed, but I suspect there will be less oodgey-goodgey(ing).

I’ll continue to have random “Baby Outbursts” because I honestly don’t think I can keep a lid on this much joy! Or perhaps when the newness wears off, I’ll just present “Baby Thoughts” in a less palsied looking way?
Stay tuned.

Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

I can’t necessarily spell necessary.

So this post is random as all get out…but it’s relevant to where I am at the moment. And since the universe revolves around me…that’s where we’ll spend our time this morning.
This all started because I was trying to write an email…digress much?

I’m an excellent speller. Always have been. Even back in elementary school, I kicked ass on spelling tests. It’s rare that I make a spelling mistake, and most people I know ask me how to spell words.
That said, there are two words I absolutely cannot spell to save my skin. Now in fairness, the words are kind of different versions of the same word..one is an adjective, the other it’s companion adverb.
The words are: necessary and necessarily.
Thank the Gods for spell check! Because I seriously struggle to spell these words.
How can that be? They seem simple enough…

My mom used to always add an E to the end of the word salad. She wrote it: salade. No matter how many times we had the conversation, she never stopped. Even though she knew better, she would say that it looked unfinished and felt it needed the E.
I mean, that’s a deliberate misspelling…and it suddenly occurs to me that all my stubbornness wasn’t strictly inherited from my dad.

My phone’s autocorrect is a total dick!
First I had to teach it to spell curse words. Now, is that something I’m proud of? Not really, but if I want to use curse words, they better damn skippy be spelled properly, yo!
I also had to teach it my last name.
I also had to teach it Thing 2’s given name.
thing-2-autocorrect
When she called me the next day, she was all, I had half a mind not to call you at all! That’s not even my name! I can’t believe you spelled my name wrong! You gave it to me! You’ve been spelling it to people my whole life! (P.S she called, I’m just sayin’.)
I was a whole lot of, Wait! What?
So I went back and looked at the text message…Ohhhh.
Then we laughed about it.
But I was mad! Stupid phone! Can’t spell my kid’s name right. Loser phone.

Anyway.
God love, Thing 1. That kid can’t spell for anything. She got that from her dad, he can’t spell either. Now Thing 2 has the handwriting of a serial killer, but she can spell. Did she get that from me? (not the serial killer bit)
YBW can’t spell either, neither can Thing G.
Is it in the genes?
Beats me.

Does it matter that I can’t spell those words? I suspect not. What’s curious about it to me is no matter how many times I work on it, I just don’t seem to get it right. Am I doomed to misspell them for eternity?
Probably. But I don’t necessarily care, because spell check is my friend. (see what I did there?)

Are there words that you know you can’t spell? That you are so grateful for spellcheck that you weep with joy?
Let me know in the comments!

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I amuse myself

Well, I finally finished my mind map!
bitmoji
No. Not really.
But almost.
I amuse myself.

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*sips fruit salad*

Thing 1 posted this on my facebook this week.
I was amused.
fb_img_1471553142543.jpg
Then I got to thinking…did I drink too much when the girls were growing up?
Am I a bad mom?
Am I a bad example?
I’ve decided to answer all three of these questions with a nopity nope.
I am an excellent mom. Playful and sincere, with loads of important life lessons.
Of course, I’ve had phone calls or text messages from each of them at one time or another asking me for my Cosmopolitan recipe.
Hmm…perhaps I’m not the best mom after all…
Meh, I’ll just have another sip of my fruit salad and decide not to worry about it.

Categories: me, on being a mom | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

let’s communicate in hashtags

I got a text from my sister in law in Charleston on Friday suggesting a new way to communicate. She said she wanted to send me a hashtag of what she observed in the world and as a barometer of how she’s feeling.
I adore the idea! We can go as sedate or over the top as needed. Sometimes it’ll be ridiculously long and complicated, other times less so.

I present for your consideration as sampling of our hashtag communication.

Friday July 29, 2016
Hers: #sometimesitsbettertojustdoityourself
Mine: #ineedanappy
Hers: #icantbenicetoday
Mine: #justcallmethemistressofallevil and then #f**kem

Nothing transpired on Saturday.

Sunday July 31,2016
Mine: #phantomoftheopera
Hers: #luckyduck and then #ilivevicariouslythroughyou
Mine: #igotyouyo and then #mikesfordinner
Hers: #fml
Mine: #ihatetherforeiam
Hers: #cestmoi
Mine: #iloveyyouohmygoodness
Hers: #validation
Mine: #iwillalwasyhaveyourback

I wrote about my emotional struggles last week in strangest, weirdest, most complicated woman and I’ve written about my beloved sister in law in emotionally safe in the nest.
She and I have a curious relationship. We tease that she, and not Thing 1, is my first daughter. We are truly sisters, but as I am the consummate nurturer, and she grew up without a healthy maternal relationship, we simply fell into that pattern in our own relationship. Neither of us mind, because she has nurtured me when I’ve needed it too.

We all struggle with our lives, with our choices. We have real love for the people in our world and sometimes real dislike. It has it’s own natural ebb and flow.
Her suggestion to communicate in hashtags was brilliant as far as I’m concerned. It’s a simple way to not overthink or overstate what we see and feel. Sometimes it my seem more negative than positive, but that’s the genius of it. One tiny hashtag can expel a great deal of negative energy, thus creating space for something positive.

Yesterday, YBW and I went to see Phantom with friends. Before we even left the house, I told YBW that I was uncomfortable. If it hadn’t been since I was pregnant with Thing 2 that I’d seen Phantom, I may have even begged off. I love this couple as individual people, and I can see how much good they are for each other, but I absolutely cannot stand to be with them any longer than I have to. They don’t socialize in the ‘group’, they socialize with each other which leaves others in the ‘group’ working hard to create a healthy social climate within the group. And I simply was not having it. But I wanted to see Phantom and I’m perfectly capable of keeping my mouth shut and ignoring what goes on around me enough to enjoy the show.
I actually fantasized about jumping from the moving car to get away from these people. Of course, YBW was going damn near 80 up I95…so I considered how much skin I might lose and what sort of head trauma might occur and made the decision to remain safely buckled in the vehicle. #dammit

Now, partly this is me. I’ve been in a strange place emotionally. I’m aware of and admit that. In the last week I’ve been told (by people who love me and have my best interests at heart) I’m quick to judge and that I because I speak my mind, I can come across as abrasive.
Um…thanks? #kissmyfrecklywhiteass
I know these things were said to me out of love, because I trust the person who said them. But if I was to boil myself down to two descriptive things those would not be the ones. #notreallyabitch

I apologized for being caustic, explained that was not my intention.
If I can’t speak honestly and from my heart, why speak at all? I’m a straight shooter. I don’t pull punches. I say what I think and feel out of love. Out of a desire to help others, and continue to learn. #velvethammer

I’m tired of censoring myself for the sake of other people’s feelings. I honestly can’t believe I’m as bad as all that…if I was, nobody would want to be around me ever. And guess what? Folks want to be around me.

I understand my sister in law’s desire to communicate via hashtags. I’m going to continue to text her hashtags and enjoy receiving hers. It amuses me. It’s a playful way to say what you need to say without fear recrimination. Because more than anything, more than judgement, more than annoyance, more than anything, I love. And that right there is enough reason for me. #hatersgonnahate but #ilove

Categories: love, me | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

narcissistic much?

I’m a complete and total narcissist and without question or doubt, the world absolutely revolves around me.

Just kidding.

Or am I?

Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

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