Posts Tagged With: rude

I’m a ray of f**king sunshine

I really like cuss words.
Profanity.
Dirty words.
Offensive language.
Bad words.
Expletives.
Swear words.
Obscenitites
Whatever you call ’em, they make me happy.
I find them excellent descriptive words great for most any situation.

I have been told that my passion for, and abundant use of curse words denotes a lack of intelligence on my part. (You know I’m saying a great big ‘f**k you’ to those folks.) But, According to Richard Stephens at Keele University,

The fact is that the size of your vocabulary of swear words is linked with your overall vocabulary, and swearing is inextricably linked to the experience and expression of feelings and emotions.

Unlike the vast majority of women in the world, (some men too) I am a fan of the “C word”.
I know.
I don’t mind if you judge me. Most folks do when it comes to this particular word.
To me it’s just another bad word. It doesn’t offend me in any way, and in some cases I find it amusing.
So much so that I had a bit of a squee when banter cards ran a half-price sale on their ‘not quite perfect’ hardback notebooks!
I ordered a few. I mean honestly can one ever have enough journals?
And they’re just so me.
(“C word” alert!!)

As happy as I am with each one, and My C**ting Notepad brings me the biggest smirk, I’m going to have to admit that List Whore just might be my favorite.
Like there was any doubt…but y’all! It even has a little heart! I (heart) lists!
Though a reminder to not be a bitch is always helpful, because some times I simply can’t help myself.

Going to contemplate the perfect use for each one…
In the meantime, I got fun stickers for immediate use in my planner.

Organized as f**k.
You know it!

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Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

talking mad s**t about you

Thing 1 and Husband N have no patience when it comes to gender norms for the bebe. They’re not about ‘pink’ and ‘blue’.
I’m feeling them…to a degree, I mean occasionally a baby girl needs a little pink something in the midst of her bad ass super hero attire. But I’m all for boys wearing pink and having dolls. And girl or boy, this little bebe of ours will be blessed with more than love, and some pretty fun things. Dollies and the sweetest of lovies. Trucks and blocks, and the softest damn gray elephant blankie you’ve ever felt. (I may have already purchased that. What? It matches the one I gave his or her mommy for Christmas.)

Thing 1 is already showing her zero f**ks given attitude when it comes to humor and the bebe.
She wants it to have a bunch of rude onesies before it understands that there are bad words printed on it’s clothing.
She knows she’ll get pushback from some folks, but she doesn’t care. (Remember I said zero f**ks given?) Personally I think it’s funny. And so very Thing 1 and Husband N. They’re all about letting your freak flag fly.

Here are a few examples of what our sweet bebe could be wearing when she or he arrives. Thing 1 found these at Spencers.

This one is dead on balls accurate because the “F word” is one of all of our favorites.


This one is all about Thing 2. Who is possibly more excited to become an auntie than Thing 1 is to be a mom!


Poor bebe. It’s joining a bunch of zany madcap folks…on both sides!

And finally, my absolute favorite.

I cackled when I read this one.
I can’t even be mad about the grammar.
I can see Thing 1 and her bebe in cahoots talking about the trashy “Walmart babies” in their diapers and needing a bath.
Hmmm…actually the bebe needs a onesie that says ‘me and my (insert TBD adorable grandmother name here) talk mad shit about you’. Because we will.

I know our sense of humor is dark. I know we’re pretty sardonic.
But apart from some (really old and not hip) grandmother reading these onesies on this bebe and being offended, I don’t feel like there’s too much harm in my daughter expressing her sense of humor and world view via the clothes in which she dresses her child. Up to a point…and she’s smart enough to know she’s not sending that kid to school in any of these things, she’s going to have it in their home, and yard, and with us.
I respect the expression of inappropriate points of view printed on these baby clothes. It’s ridiculous, it’s foul, it’s not at all appropriate. But it’s just so damn amusing.
And the bebe won’t be able to read for a really long time. I mean seriously, little muffin won’t even be able to hold it’s head up for a while.
I think they’re funny. But that’s because I don’t have all that many f**ks to give either.

Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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