me

summer gratitude

Posted on September 4, 2019 by robynbird

As we move into fall, I’m thinking about everything that filled my heart with joy this summer, and y’all, that list is long!
I have so much to be grateful for!

June:
sleeping in my own bed for the first time in six weeks
seeing Amber for the first time since March
date day with Mike and Josie
Describe the Night at the Woolly Mammoth (last play of the season)
impromptu trip to Williamsburg with Mike and Josie
two of my three alternative health care providers
dinner with Nora and Dale

July:
porchlife

all three of my alternative health care providers
dinner with Meredith and Beau’s family
celebrating Nora’s birthday (she and Thing 2 are birthday twins)
Thing 1, Thing 2, Husband N, and Baby K here!
pedis with my girls
Spending the day with Thing C and Girlfriend L
drinking bubbly with my girls
Bubbly & Baby party to celebrate Baby K being in our world
2 Silos with YBW, Thing 1, Thing 2, Husband N, Baby K, and Jessica
stopping cocktails on the way to the airport with Thing 2

August:
Thing 2 and Baby K here for two more weeks
model home tours
porchlife

going away party to celebrate Mike and Josie’s college bound daughter
all three alternative health care providers
Good Eats: The Return
drinking beer, cracking crab legs and peeling shrimp at Blue Ridge

the never ending road trip with Thing 1 and Baby K
seeing Thing 2 and Boyfriend J during a pit stop in Columbia
spending the second day back to school day drinking with Holly
shoot day with YBW
discovering Natty Boh with YBW
Vampire Weekend
YBW’s bestie from high school here with his fam
Nat’s game (Tony hit two dingers!)
finishing my paper

September looks like it’s starting out slow, but that’s fine by me, I’m learning to take it easy. I’m learning the journey is where it’s at. (Though, to be perfectly honest, I’m all about ‘getting there’.)
I’ve already got some stuff on the calendar for next week, but I’m curious to see what pops up.
I’m looking forward to spending more time with YBW as we move into Autumn.
Ready to make new so many new reasons to be grateful!

Categories: me | Tags: Baby K, family, friends, grateful, gratitude, joy, love, mothers and daughters, summer, thankful, Thing 1, Thing 2, YBW | 2 Comments

an ‘outrageous’ shoot day

Posted on August 28, 2019 by robynbird

Saturday was a shoot day!
YBW and I took our cameras to Medowlark Gardens in Vienna.

The weather was glorious, sunny and breezy with temperatures between 77 and 82. The perfect respite to the summer heat we’ve been experiencing.

We went through the woods.

Around the spiral path to the gazebo.

Where the plants were gathered together to attract pollinators.

Down to the first (of three) ponds.

At the second pond.

I’m not sure how long we actually wandered the park, but I do know that when we left, we were both ready for lunch, so off we went to Red’s Table.

We sat on their porch overlooking the lake.
A cocktail for me, and locally brewed draft beer for YBW.
The view was beautiful.
The people watching was fascinating.
The food was lovely.

The server smiled at me and said, “Your hair is outrageous!”
I smiled and touched my hair and he left to put in our order.
I looked at YBW and said, “Outrageous?”
YBW assured me the server meant it as a compliment.
I actually agreed, but it landed so awkwardly in me.

I let my freak flag fly that day by washing my hair and letting it do its thing. It’s always a crap shoot, as I never know if I’ll end up rocking messy romantic waves, or look like I recently escaped from Azkaban.
I was fearful I had Azkaban hair because we’d been driving with the windows down.
I took a picture of myself to see what the server saw.

I’m over here like, Um…that’s just my hair, dude.

So I googled the word outrageous and here’s what I got:

I’m going with the second definition, if you please.

Anyway, it was a wonderful shoot day!
I love being behind the lens. I love being in the out of doors with my precious husband.
As we move into Autumn, I’m looking forward to more shoot days!

Categories: me | Tags: behind the lens, botanical garden, brunch, camera, let your freak flag fly, Meadowlark Gardens, Red's Table, shoot day, YBW | 6 Comments

who’s on your list?

Posted on August 23, 2019 by robynbird

I just read this book called The Dinner List by Rebecca Serle.
On the eve of her thirtieth birthday, Sabrina is late to meet her closest friend for dinner. When she arrives at the restaurant, she finds not only her friend Jessica, but, her deceased father, favorite college professor, estranged boyfriend, and Audrey Hepburn.
These guests from the list she wrote at the insistence of her friend when they were nineteen and in their first year of college.
Let’s just say that while wackiness ensues, there is a great deal of love at that dinner table.

Haven’t we all considered the question:
What five people, living or dead, real or imagined, would you invite to dinner?

But how do you really answer it if you know it’s never going to be an actual thing?
Do you just choose randomly?
Does your curiosity drive your list?
Do you create your list based upon unfinished business?
Do you consider things such as, desire to interact with these particular people, but not how they might interact with one another?

I’ve been thinking about how I would create this top five guests list, and I’m noticing it changes with my mood.
For instance, I’ve always wanted Grandaddy to know Thing 1 and Thing 2. I’ve also wanted him to know YBW. But that’s four out of my five guests.
And honestly, I know and love these people so much, it doesn’t really matter if they know each other. Three of them know each other and all of them know/knew me. Perhaps that’s enough.

As I consider this dinner list, I have to ask myself, what’s my motivation?

Perhaps I choose a straight literary guest dinner?
Or film industry folks?
Or musicians?
I mean, picking Billy Wilder’s brain at dinner sounds absolutely wonderful…but do I plan an entire dinner party around that?

What if I choose at random?
Just five humans I’m curious about, you know?
What kind of dinner party does that actually create? That goes back to how my guests would interact with one another. And let’s get real for a moment, that’s an important part of planning a successful dinner party.

So, what if I create a guest list at random? I invite people that fascinate me.
That list could look like this:
Ben Bradlee
Mark Twain
Erin Van Vuren
Rick Bragg’s mama
Grace Kelly

I mean, WTF kind of dinner party is this?
Would these guests get on together?
What would I actually serve these people?
I’d be fangirling about three of them to the point I might actually pee my pants!
Or would I?
Perhaps I’d be lovely and gracious and we could all learn wonderful things from and with each other.

Ha! Let’s get real!
I’d be worried I’m not smart enough to be in the same room with Mark Twain.
Not informed enough to be in the same room with Ben Bradlee.
Not clever enough to be in the same room Erin Van Vuren. Though honestly, I feel like she’s the safest bet.
Not graceful enough to be in the same room with Grace Kelly!
And while I suspect I’m down to earth enough for Rick Bragg’s mama, I feel like she’d judge the food, and that would break my heart.

No, I don’t think I’d enjoy myself at that dinner.
I don’t feel like it would meet my expectations of ‘The List’.
A dinner party should be enjoyable for the hostess as well as the guests.

That’s why I considered it from a different perspective.
Who would I like to talk with and enjoy spending the evening with in a way that suits who I am as a person?
Who might actually enjoy spending time with me, and each other?
Who do I want to connect with on a deeper level than fascination or fangirling?
With whom do I want to drink cocktails and/or wine?

After some serious thought, I present my dinner list:
Alan Cumming
Carol Burnett
Dominique Browning
Nick Drake
Richard Burton

For me, this dinner is an ideal combination of playful, serious, humor, kindness, and darkness.
A dinner party to really sink my teeth into.
I mean, sure, there are people I ‘like’ more, or am a bigger ‘fan’ of, and whatnot, but, this group of people feels at once comfortable and challenging. And I love that!

I’m curious what y’all think of my list.
I’d love to know who’s on your list, and how did you decide?
Is it harder than you expected it to be?

Categories: me | Tags: books, communication, dream dinner party guest list, experience, inspiration, reading, the dinner list, what five people living or dead would you have dinner with | Leave a comment

collecting my reflections

Posted on August 22, 2019 by robynbird

In the last month I’ve had a house full of daughters, a son-in-law, and one sweet baby.
Organized and hosted the most wonderful party to celebrate Baby K.

welcome to the Bubbly & Baby to celebrate Baby K

Who’s that baby?
a guessing game

yummies and goodies

a monogrammed cake was one of my ‘must haves’

*all photos credited to Thing 2 and used with permission*

I spent precious time with my girls.
We shopped. Visited with friends. Attended a party to celebrate a friend’s daughter going away to college.

Yesterday, I made the long journey home from GA where I left Thing 1 and Baby K at home. (Husband N was here for two weeks and returned home empty handed, while Thing 1 and Baby K stayed here with us for another two weeks.)

Now here I am, daughter-less and baby-less, which I don’t love in the least.
But, the truth of the matter is I’m content to be me.

I didn’t write in my journal or for this blog in all that time.
I was so busy living in the moment, I didn’t take the time for reflections.
My reflections are shooting out all over the place and I’m racing to collect them.
I need a bit of time with my journal for sure.

I’ve finished the first half of my thesis paper. I’m meeting with the course adviser this afternoon to create a plan to proceed with the second half. My plan is to submit the finished paper by the end of the month. I’ll be OK if it comes back for revision because my term doesn’t end until September 30th. That gives me another whole month to make sure all I’ve dotted all the i(s) and crossed all the t(s). And then I’m finished.

I’m a bit overwhelmed even thinking about all the time that will free up.
How will I spend it?
I don’t want to waste any more time.
I mean, I’ll waste some time, cause I like to watch the TV occasionally, you know?
I want to use my time successfully.
For the betterment of me.
For my own personal pleasure.

I’ll get about that soon enough, right now I’m going to take a moment to miss little nugget of deliciousness.

OK, baby fix, check.
Time to move on to collecting my reflections and planning how to spend my time.
I’ve got this!

Categories: me | Tags: Baby K, celebrate, family, getting back to normal, life, living my intention, love, organize, planning, reflecting, sacred time, time | 4 Comments

magic or illusion

Posted on July 18, 2019 by robynbird

I saw this post on Beau’s Instagram and it rang true in me.

How many people have you encountered that are magic?
How many people have you encountered that are just illusions of magic?
My suspicion is more of the later.

People who are just the illusion of magic are the worst! Most times they’re simply reflecting your own magic back at you. Of course you can’t see that happening because you’re being dazzled by the magic. You don’t realize you’re being dazzled by your own damn magic!
Sometimes it’s actually worse than that. Sometimes these just illusion people are actually leeching your magic.
Though, to be perfectly honest, I think that’s when you begin to realize that something is amiss. It’s not exactly as it seems. You’re experiencing the drain of your own magic therefore you’re much less dazzled than if your magic is simply being reflected back at you.

I know some people who are magic.
Chock full of magic. Magic coming off them in waves. Even if their magic isn’t turned all the way on.
You know, some of the most magical people don’t even realize the extent of their own magic.
Perhaps that’s what makes them magic?

I know some people who are just illusions of magic.
Chock full of smoke and mirrors. Bullshit coming off them in waves. Even if their bullshit isn’t turned all the way on.
These are the least magical people, and they’re so desperate to appear magical they’ll stop at nothing to keep up appearances.
Poseurs.
But skilled. These illusionists can pass themselves off as the real thing.

Can a ‘trained eye’ distinguish the difference between actual magic and the illusion of magic? I honestly don’t know the answer to that. I do know that once you’ve experienced a few illusionists, you learn to better spot real magic.

I’ve always believed there’s a bit of magic down deep in each of us.
I find myself wondering if magic or just the illusion of magic comes down to intent.
Is real magic simply happening in your daily goings on?
Is the illusion of magic is caused by manipulation of that tiny nugget of magic to elicit some sort of response?

Some people are magic, others are just the illusion of it.
Powerfully thought provoking words for me this morning.

Categories: me | Tags: Beau Taplin, dazzle, illusion, intent, magic, the magic is in me | 6 Comments

little surprise for me

Posted on July 14, 2019 by robynbird

YBW brought in the mail the other day and stood at the kitchen island opening it.
A moment later, he handed me this:

Yes, I squealed!
Yes, I clapped like a little girl!
Yes, I jumped up and down while I did it!

What a sweet surprise!
And I was surprised!
I asked him if he wanted to go with me to see them and he declined. He texted me from his office the day they went on sale asking if I wanted him to buy tickets, I declined. I didn’t want to drag him to see a band he’s only mildly interested in.
Turns out he had other plans.

I’ve adored Vampire Weekend since their debut album in 2008!
They remain in constant rotation in my music.
I’m so excited!

What a thoughtful gift from my husband.
He knows what I love and he wants me to be able to have as much of it as I can.
His kindness never ceases to amaze me.
I’m so grateful. Not just for this lovely gift, but for him simply being himself.

What a wonderful way to end the Summer!

Categories: me | Tags: concert tickets, fun, gift of love, gratitude, love, music, surprise, Vampire Weekend, YBW | 3 Comments

name that bee

Posted on July 10, 2019 by robynbird

I can’t make this stuff up, y’all.
This is what Thing 1 and I get up to on a summer afternoon.

I sent a message to the girls in our group chat that I passed the third course. (YAY!)
Thing 1 replied with a Wahoo!
Then sent a pic of Baby K with the caption “Baby K says Go Birdie!”

What follows is just us being us…

Thing 1 and Thing C are big Batman fans and this little Batman along with some other Batman things were gifts from Uncle Thing C for Baby K.
I sent the bee because it was so damn cute I couldn’t stand it! It was on her registry and I sent something else randomly and the bee went too. I sent it with a card that said, “Baby K, Bee a good girl! Birdie loves you!”
Thing 1 said she reached out for the bee then gave it kisses. (OMG how cute is that!?!)
Apparently today, she’s kissing Batman.
So, it’s not bee specific, it’s lovey specific..?

Here’s Baby K with the bee.

What do y’all think?
How about some name suggestions for Baby K’s bee?
I promise to give you credit!

Categories: me | Tags: a child's lovey, Baby K, favorite toy, fun, grandmothers and graddaughters, love, love my life, lovey, mothers and daughters, playful, silly, Thing 1 | Leave a comment

nine days – the countdown to Baby K

Posted on July 9, 2019 by robynbird

OHMYGOD!!

This little nugget of adorable will be here in NINE DAYS!
AND, she’s bringing her mommy and daddy with her!
I’m so happy, I swear I might burst!!

Birdie and Baby K back together again!
SQUEEEEEEEE!

Categories: me | Tags: Baby K, Birdie and Baby K, celebration, excitement, family, granddaughter, grandmother, grandmothers and granddaughters, joy, love, unconditional love | Leave a comment

y’all gotta watch Fleabag

Posted on July 3, 2019 by robynbird

Discovered this show quite by accident. (Thanks, Prime!)

Initially I was like, WTF!?! This chick is effed-up beyond reason. But the more I watched, the more I considered that there is a bit of Fleabag in each of us. We all have secrets. We all do stupid things. We’re all gorgeously flawed in one way or another. And it helps to remember each one of us is impacted differently by grief.

I laughed till I cried. I covered my eyes in horror. I may have shown the TV the back of my middle finger when I realized there was only 6 episodes.
But then…

Andrew Scott as the priest is life!

These characters are of questionable moral fiber.
This show is raw and in your face. (I’m talking ‘C word’ raw)

I felt all the feels.
I honestly haven’t laughed this much in longer than I can remember.
Some of the best fourth wall breaks I’ve ever seen. (sorry, Deadpool)

If you’re not easily offended, get on your Amazon Prime and watch this show!
If you are easily offended, well, I’m actually quite sad for you.
Black comedy is an acquired taste.

Categories: me | Tags: Amazon Prime, Andrew Scott, black comedy, fleabag, phoebe waller-bridge, smart, television, well written | 21 Comments

I’m doing it!

Posted on June 29, 2019 by robynbird

I’ve been completely immersed in coursework. Reading, writing, and creating (more complicated than necessary) annotated bibliographies.
I passed the first of five courses in April. I’m four-fifths of the way to passing the second course. I’m fourteen-twentieths of the way through passing the third course.
The fifth and final task for the second course is that I must write an essay about how the books I read for this course impacted my personal education philosophies.
I’m over here like:

The fifteenth through twentieth portion of the third task is the last five annotated bibliographies. I’ve got all the prep work done, just need to plug summarized information into the template.

I already have a huge portion of my thesis compiled, so writing that paper will be simpler than some. That’s the fourth task.
The final task is creating a power point presentation that summarizes the thesis paper. (Waste of time, much?)

The girls, Husband N, Baby K, and Jessica are coming the third week of July for the party to celebrate Baby K. Thing 1, Husband N, and Baby K will be here for a bit over two weeks, and we’ve already started talking about how Husband N might go home, and Thing 1 and Baby K might stay here a bit longer and I’d take them home later in August. I’m not sure how long Thing 2 will be here. Jessica will be here for five days.
We’ll have a houseful! But I’m excited!!

My plan is to finish course two and three in the next week or ten days so I’ve got nothing pressing as I get ready for them to be here, and while they’re here I can simply enjoy being together.

I’ve worked so hard the last two weeks I can hardly believe it!
I’m taking breaks enough to go to the farmers market and day drink with Holly on Thursdays. Yesterday I finally had enough and decided to brave the heat and go run errands.
Today I’m debating on how much I’ll work. But YBW is on his computer and I have no idea what Thing G is doing, so I guess I’m on my own today. I can go out in the heat and be around random folks, or I can stay put and get stuff done. Or, perhaps a bit of both? Who knows.

For the first time since I began this journey of coursework I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. My term ends September thirtieth, but I plan to finish in August.
And that’s it. I’m finished with this degree plan.
I find myself wondering what I’ll do with my time once I’m not always doing coursework.
The first thing on the list is read read read. (is that actually the first three things on the list?) I’m going to tackle my TBR stack! I’m going to read for pleasure, not what’s assigned me. I’m going to sit with my stack of Southern Living magazines and devour them.

My girls are incredibly supportive of my journey. They’re quick with praise as I report my progress this term. Thing 2 has remarked on my tenacity, and that she gets hers from me. I shared with them that I’m not only doing this for myself, sticking with this commitment I made to myself even though it’s taken so much longer than anticipated. I shared that I’m doing it for them too. So they see their mom as a woman who made a commitment to herself and is working hard to keep it.

You know, since I started this degree plan, I’ve lived through a separation and divorce. My eldest graduating high school and going away to college. The sudden and unexpected deaths of both my parents. Packing up my life in South Carolina and moving it to Virginia. Two weddings, mine, and Thing 1’s. My brain injury. The death of my precious mother in law. The birth of my first grandbaby!
And those are just the big ones!
I’m not mentioning the day to day highs and lows. Simply living life, work and home and friends.
This journey started with a whole lot of hubris. I thought I had it all under control.
This journey is coming to a close with a whole lot of beautiful humility.
I’m proud of this journey! I wanted to give up so many times! But I never did. Even when I was sick. I kept on and kept on and now I’m nearing the end with joy and verve! I did the hard work that got me to this place. I will finish the hard work in the next two months.
I’m doing it!
And soon I can shout “I DID IT!!”.