I found out this week that my dad’s ex-wife (not my mom) is the beneficiary on his life insurance through the police department.
(Would you like to see a container for my joy? Envision a teeny salt cellar spoon…only teenier…nope, still teenier…yes…right about there!)
I have read I can challenge the beneficiary but will need counsel. My cousin has hooked me up with someone she knows…but I have to pay $200 just to meet this woman. And I’m concerned that the ex wife will sue me for a copy of the death certificate…and win.
I would have that money sit and rot before I’d let her have it…so I need to decide how to move forward.
My brother is convinced there is “mortgage insurance” a policy somewhere that will pay the balance of the mortgage on our dad’s house so we can sell it free and clear…so far, I’ve found no evidence…but a close friend of Daddie’s has offered to purchase the house at fair market value, so we are leaning that direction…it would cover the mortgage as well as leave a bit of money for each of our pockets.
I’m inclined to put mine away for Things 1 and 2…but my brother wants me to be in a safer vehicle…mine isn’t unsafe, it’s just made by a manufacturer he doesn’t like.
I’m beginning to dislike the word executrix…specifically because it’s a new “label” for me…I don’t want the responsibility…the hassle…any of it really.
I am taking up the mantle because it was asked of me by my Daddie, he trusted me enough to be the responsible one…
He told me once he was sad I wasn’t his mommy…that I was such a wonderful mommy and he wished sometimes I could have been his mommy and he would know how well he was loved by the way I cared for him.
I’m not his mommy, but I can take care of these last things for him because he was well loved.
That’s what good daughters do.
therobynbirdsnest 
I cannot believe that it was his ex-wife who benefits! was it an old policy he simply forgot to change?
Yes, it seems that way, I’m making an appointment to meet with an attorney to see if there is anything to be done. If not, she gets it and we get nothing…it’s not about money, it’s the principle.
My son had a friend who passed away tragically in his early 30s. He was in a relationship and had a very young child. His partner came across an old insurance policy and when she tried to claim, the beneficiary was his old girlfriend from a decade before. The girlfriend (who had known nothing of the policy and meant nothing to him) tried to then claim the lot. The partner is now in appeal for the benefit of the young child. I do not see how anyone, in the situation as the girlfriend, could do anything except give up the money.