be honest and unmerciful

The other day when I was writing about covert incest, I sent Thing 2 a message letting her know I was writing about that subject matter. That I was keeping her personal work private but that I was discussing her and I wanted to make sure that she was OK with it.

Her response?

One of my most beloved scenes from Almost Famous is a late night phone call between William and Lester Bangs in which the latter says, “Be honest and unmerciful.”

Thing 2 is a also fan of this movie, and that particular line.
I love that about her.

Honest and unmerciful.
I feel like that’s my current state of being.
Perhaps it’s Thing 2’s state of being as she does the hard work of self?

Recently, I attacked a situation that’s given me great grief, with an honest and unmerciful look at myself. I came up with an (equally) honest and unmerciful plan on how to proceed.

Y’all might be questioning the whole ‘unmerciful’ bit.
To be perfectly honest, I don’t blame you.
Unmerciful sounds a bit…what?
Cruel? Harsh?
Sans mercy.

Here’s the thing though, when I say ‘honest and unmerciful’ I’m using it the way I feel Lester Bangs did.

I believe it’s my job to be honest about who I am and what I’m doing in my life.
I’m no longer trying to be what other people want or expect.
I’m being honest to myself, and unmerciful with both the beauty and ugliness of my truth.

I am viewing everything I was, am, and shall be through this honest and unmerciful lens.
It makes me a more real me.
It helps me bring my truth to the world without feeling guilty, or fearful, or shameful.

Not like, ‘This is me. Like it or lump it.’
More like, ‘This is me. I see me. I present myself to be seen.”

If I am honest and unmerciful with myself, I become a better human, because what I bring to the world is as true and real as possible.
Yes. That’s it.
I will be honest and unmerciful as I look at myself. At my life.
For that is the mark of a true (and uncool) friend.

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Categories: me | Tags: , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

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6 thoughts on “be honest and unmerciful

  1. Growing up means being honest with yourself. It’s what leads to happiness and becoming content with who you are. πŸ’—πŸ’—

    • Amen to that!
      Look at me still growing up. πŸ˜‰
      Seriously though, these changes I’ve made over the last few weeks have freed me. I am in an internal place that feels so peaceful. I mean of course I’ll have questions, but nothing hinges on the answers. I’m currently content to be me.
      I’ve not been in this emotional space before.
      I love it!

  2. I love the clarity you are having. Great post and reflection.

  3. Brutally honest with myself, honest with others, but perhaps I have learnedto be merciful with all. ❀
    Thank you Robynbird πŸ’˜

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